I’ve had the opportunity to pop into every one of your learning zones a few times already, and I see the engines of learning turning the first week of school! Lincoln is off to a great start!

I’ve been on a mission lately. I’m counting the number of learners in each classroom to get an “exact” number for attendance, and I’ll keep doing that this week as well. During this two-week mission I’ve had a chance to meet new faces and welcome them to the family, ensuring they truly do “belong” in our little home we call Lincoln.

I stumbled across something that made me stop in my tracks and forced me to make a quick U-Turn. All my life I have never wavered from the Golden Rule. You know it. “Treat others the way YOU would want to be treated.” It makes sense… in general. I want people to respect me, so I should respect them. I look them in the eye when I shake their hand, and so should they. We all know the Golden Rule. However, I now believe that even with this “gold standard” there is still potential for inequity to rear its ugly head.

I was visiting Mrs. Barbani’s 3rd grade class, and she was reviewing some of the norms the class had established as a community. They were talking about the Golden Rule. Suddenly, in front of all the children, Mrs. Barbani looked to me and said, “Mr. Hoff. Don’t you think the Golden Rule should be about treating others the way THEY want to be treated?”

I paused… My “fixed mindset” on this particular topic… challenged for the first time in 44 years!

Everything in my core believed that the Golden Rule could withstand the test of time… until this moment. “Wait… What?!?!”

Mrs. Barbani continued… “Everyone has a unique way of wanting to be treated, so maybe we should be thinking about treating people the way THEY want to be treated; not just the way WE want to be treated.”

This is a profound statement, as it truly challenges the status quo. Needless to say, I couldn’t help but agree. This notion of understanding individuals, before assuming they subscribe to the same set of habits, rituals, ideals and beliefs, can and will expand our own abilities.

Nicely put, Mrs. Barbani. Your super powers are in full force! I learned something new today while I took a stroll through your 3rd grade class. If we are going to make our world a better place, we need to be more proactive about understanding how each of us sees the world and would like to be treated. Transformation and change were never meant to be easy. There is, after all, a tragic tendency to rely heavily on keeping the status quo. I cannot presume that just because I like a “high five,” a big hug, being called Mr. Hoff, wearing a hat indoors, mismatched socks, and certain foods at lunch… that everyone else should follow suit. If I did, some may see that as disrespect. Shame on me.

The Golden Rule is turning platinum. I have no doubt that the price of our own, individual beliefs and truths we hold dearly are destined to rise in value… but only when we actively express interest in getting to know one another. Let us treat others the way THEY want to be treated. 🙂